Dr. Leroy, the
head psychiatrist at the local mental hospital, is examining patients to see if
they're cured and ready to re-enter society.
"So, Mr. Clark," the doctor says to one of his patients, "I see by your chart
that you've been recommended for dismissal. Do you have any idea what you might
do once you're released?"
The patient thinks for a moment, then replies, "Well, I went to school for mechanical
engineering. That's still a good field, good money there. But on the other hand,
I thought I might write a book about my experience here in the hospital, what
it's like to be a patient here. People might be interested in reading a book like
that. In addition, I thought I might go back to college and study art history,
which I've grown interested in lately."
Dr. Leroy nods and says, "Yes, those all sound like intriguing possibilities."
The patient replies, "And the best part is, in my spare time, I can go on being
a teapot."

A young woman married
and had 13 boys. Her husband died. She soon married again and had 7 more boys.
Again, her husband died. But, she remarried and this time had 5 more boys.
Alas, she finally croaked.
Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed to the Lord above, thanking him
for this loving woman who fulfilled his commandment to "Go forth and multiply."
In his final eulogy, he noted, "Thank you Lord, they're finally together."
Leaning over to his neighbour, one mourner asked... "Do you think he means her
first, second or third husband?"
The other mourner then replied... "I think he means her legs."