One day God came
to Adam for a brief discussion. "I've got some good news and some bad news." God
said.
Adam looked thoughtfully at his maker and replied, "Please give me the good news
first."
Smiling, God explained, "I've created two new organs for you. One is called a
brain. This organ will allow you to be very intelligent, create new things, and
carry on productive conversations with Eve. The other organ is called a penis.
It will allow you to reproduce your intelligent life form and begin populating
the planet. Eve will be very pleased that you are now equipped with this organ
as she will be able to conceive boys."
Adam, very excited, exclaimed, "These are great and wonderful gifts you have given
me. What could possibly be bad news after such great tidings?"
God then looked upon Adam, and said with great sorrow, "The bad news is I only
gave you enough blood to operate one of these organs at a time."

A young couple left the church and arrived at the hotel where they were spending the first night of their honeymoon. They opened the champagne and began undressing.

When the bridegroom removed his socks, his new wife asked, "Ewww - what's wrong with your feet? Your toes look all mangled and weird. Why are your feet so gross?"

"I had tolio as a boy," he answered.

"You mean polio?" she asked.

"No, tolio. The disease only affected my toes."

The bride was satisfied with this explanation, and they continued undressing. When the groom took off his pants, his bride once again wrinkled up her nose.

"What's wrong with your knees?" She asked. "They're all lumpy and deformed!"

"As a boy, I also had kneasles," he explained.

"You mean measles?" she asked.

"No, kneasles. It was a strange illness that only affected my knees."

The new bride had to be satisfied with this answer. As the undressing continued, her husband at last removed his underwear.

"Don't tell me," she said. "Let me guess.. Smallcox?"