A young blonde
was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator
shoes, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers,
the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can
get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"
The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch
yourself a big one!"
Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself
an alligator.
Later in the day, the shopkeeper is driving home,when he spots the young woman
standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he sees a huge 9-foot
alligator swimming quickly toward her. She takes aim, kills the creature, and
with a great deal of effort hauls it on to the swamp bank.
Laying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watches
in amazement.
Just then the blonde flips the alligator on it's back, and frustrated, shouts
out, "Damn, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"

After a bizarre
cliff side accident, all eleven members of the women's outing found themselves
hanging perilously from a rope over the edge of the cliff. Ten of the women were
blondes and one was a brunette. After dangling there for a only a short while
it became obvious that the rope would not hold all their collective weight. They
decided that to prevent the rope snapping and killing them all, one of them must
sacrifice themselves and let go, to save the others.
Well they talked about it for a while but no-one could decide a fair way of of
choosing who should jump. Finally, the brunette, exasperated by the indecisiveness
of the blondes, could see that if nobody acted soon the rope was going to snap.
To save the others she bravely decided that it must be her who made the sacrifice.
She plucked up a little courage and told the others that she would jump to save
them.
After giving a short but very moving speech that she hoped would be remembered
after she'd gone, the blondes were so moved that they all started clapping!