A teenager comes
home from school and asks her mother "Is it true what Rita just told me? Babies
come out of the same place where boys put their dicks?"
"Yes, dear" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and
she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter.
"But then when I have a baby," responded the teenager "won't it knock my teeth
out?"

A man and a woman
were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order
at a table a few paces away noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair
and under the table, with the woman acting unconcerned.
The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight
under the table. Still, the woman dining across from him appeared calm and unruffled,
apparently unaware that her dining companion had disappeared.
After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said
to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the
table."
The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, "No he didn't. He just walked
in the door."