This husband and
wife are staying in a hotel, and after a romantic evening wining and dining they
go off to bed.
However, as soon as they settled down, the man leans over and whispers softly,
"Hey snuggle boopy boops, your lickle hubby wubby isn't quite ready for bye-byes
yet."
The wife takes the hint and says, "OK, but I have to use the bathroom first."
So off she goes but on her way back she trips over a piece of carpet and lands
flat on her face. Her husband jumps up and exclaims in a concerned tone "Oh my
little honey bunny, is your nosey-wosey all right?"
No harm is done, so she jumps into bed and they have mad passionate sex for three
hours. Afterwards, the wife goes off to the bathroom again, but on her way she
trips over the same piece of carpet and again lands flat on her face on the floor.
Her husband looks over and grunts "Clumsy bitch."

A father was very
anxious to marry off his daughter so he wanted tried impress her first date. "Do
you like to screw?" he asks.
"Huh?!" replied the surprised young man.
"My daughter, she loves to screw and she's very good at it. You and she should
go screw." carefully explained the father.
Now very interested, the boy replied, "Yes, sir!" Minutes later the girl came
down the stairs, kissed her father goodbye and the couple left.
After only a few minutes she reappeared, furious, dress torn, hair a mess and
screamed, "Dammit, Daddy, get it right, it's the TWIST!"