A woman sought
the advice of a sex therapist, confiding that she found it increasingly difficult
to find a man who could satisfy her, and that it was very wearisome getting in
and out of all these short term relationships.
"Isn't there some way to judge the size of a man's equipment from the outside?"
she asked earnestly.
"The only foolproof way, is by the size of his feet," counselled the therapist.
So the woman went downtown and proceeded to cruise the streets, until she came
across a young fellow standing in an unemployment line with the biggest feet she
had ever laid her eyes on.
She took him out to dinner, wined and dined him, and then took him back to her
apartment for an evening of abandon.
When the man woke up the next morning, the woman had already gone but, by the
bedside table was a $20 bill and a note that read, "With my compliments, take
this money and go out and buy a pair of shoes that fit you."

An escaped convict broke into a house and tied up a young couple who had been sleeping in the bedroom. As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his voluptuous young wife, bound-up on the bed in a skimpy nightgown, and whispered,
"Honey, this guy hasn't seen a woman in years. Just cooperate with anything he wants. If he wants to have sex with you, just go along with it and pretend you like it. Our lives depend on it!"
"Dear," the wife hissed, spitting out her gag, "I'm so relieved you feel that way, because he just told me he thinks you have a nice, tight butt!"